Holy me.
Paranoia is still in me. However, I wont let it bother me. Maybe its not me. Wow, I realized that all 3 sentences eneded with 'me'. haha. wth. ANYWAY, Im always trying my best when it comes to my friends. Especially my close ones. I just dont know why we have to be in the same situation over & over again. Sighhs. Maybe Imnot trying hard enough. [so much for not letting it bother me..]

You cant always have what you want. We plan but God controls everything. We do have choices in life but God already knows the future of what our decisions are. When we realized our mistakes, He is more than happy to forgive us. God is not bad at all. If you feel that you commited too many sins & that its too late to repent, that's bullshit. It's never to late to get close to God again. He will still love you & forgive you, just be sure that you're sincere about repenting. & if you know that God will still forgive for whatever you do, dont take advantage of it, dammit. For example, you choose to take in alcohol, eat pork, not doing your prayers & things that God forbids since you know that one day when you ask for forgiveness, God will gladly forgive you. Nope, it doesnt work that way. He's not dumb. God knows you're intentions & your thoughts before you even start. Im blessed to be born as a Muslim. Eventhough there are SO many restrictions, I know that its for our own good. Islam is a very clean, peaceful & beautiful religion. [not comparing to any others]
I thank God for everything. Amin.

My mom's sick again): She's been coughing & having terrible headaches. Im gonna send her to Raffles Hospital for check-up soon. I just hope she's gonna be okay & she wont have any illnesses or something like that. Im really scared)": I dont want her to go just yet. I still need her for as long as it takes...